Show, Don’t Tell

When writing a story, we must show the readers the story, not tell it. You do tell the story, but you have to show it as well. A few ways in going this, is by:

1) Description- telling how something/someone/place looks like, helps the show the story, paints a picture.

2) Smell- telling how the surrounds smell

3) Sound- bang, the sound of someone voice, so on.

4) Taste- bitter, sweet, sour, big red gun…

5)Touch- silk, smooth, rough,….

(I hope you are getting my points.)

Now I want to be open with you all, this post has been waiting to be posted for a month already. I didn’t know how to explain the Show, Don’t Tell, so today texting my best friend Hubert, I got a idea on how to explain it. So here is how I will show you, not tell you (LOL). I will show you a part of my story, then I will show you the revision part too.

Telling (This was written at the beginning of me learning how to write):

As Brian pointed me to the front office, I couldn’t help but openly gawk at the beauty of the school. The school appeared to be of gothic style with the walls made of brick. Golden-framed paintings of previous students hung along the walls. I stared at them as I passed by them. It felt as if they were looking right at me when I went by them. It didn’t freak me out though; actually I thought it was cool. I felt as if I was being stared at, but, when I turned around looking for the source, I found no one there.

Showing (This was written this year, in between writing classes and reading books on writing):

As we walked, I looked around the grounds and saw how beautiful it all was. Behind the gates there was a stunning garden with blue, white, and purple flowers underneath a big tree with white flowers. Right the in middle of all this beauty, stood a gothic building filled with mystery and power. The front of the school stood three floors tall made of gray stone. The windows were pointed arched and covered, from the inside, with red drapes so I couldn’t see inside the rooms. He talked about classes, the students, and how the rooming would work. I listened to everything he was saying, but as we walked into the hallway, I suddenly felt watched. I stopped walking, turning to look behind me.

There was no one there, though.

The only thing staring at me was the faces of the past. Golden-framed paintings of pervious students hung along the walls. I stared at them as I passed. I heard Master Young’s voice farther, so I hurried to catch up. He turned around just as I was reaching him.

If you can tell, the more detail you put into your story the more real it seem in the readers’ heads. Now I am not telling you to detail every little thing in your story. There is a balance to writing, which is sometime hard to find, but you can do it, I believe in you. I think the most important details that you should worry on writing are:

Places/Locations

Characters

and last, but at least,

What The Characters Are Doing As Their Talk (something, I did this when I first started to write. I just wrote down the story).

Night Owl,

A.Goddess

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